Uninvited guests.
I come unprepared this week.
The reason is that I have two new roommates.1 They have stayed with me before. They usually show up without any warning, stay for a while, and then, at some point, leave again. I find their company difficult, but I let them stay. Please don’t ask me why…
They have been here for a while now. They never really introduced themselves to me, but I was able to catch their last names: he is Mr. Imposter, and her name is Mrs. Procrastination (from now on simply: Mr. I and Mrs. P). They are not married, but would make a great couple if you’d ask me.
I can’t remember who showed up first this time, but I think it was Mrs. P. But it didn’t take long before Mr. I arrived as well. I am convinced Mrs. P called and invited Mr. I over, but I have no proof, and don’t think it really matters.
In the past few weeks, I have been working on a couple of different projects and kept hitting different obstacles and roadblocks. Some were easier to manage than others, but all of them chipped away at my motivation to keep going. One day, Mrs. P suggested taking a break from it all and doing something else instead: making dinner, walking the dog, taking a nap, making the doctor’s appointment I have been meaning to make for weeks, doing the taxes - she is a cornucopia of ideas on what I should rather do than working on my projects. I followed her advice. I did all the things she suggested, hoping that the feeling of accomplishment would fuel my energy and motivation to face the roadblocks again.
This went on for a while until Mr. I came knocking on my door, right when I was running out of prepared newsletters. I was sitting at the table, trying to think of a topic for my next newsletter, when he started one of his long monologues, sharing his thoughts about my writing. Let’s just say he was critical. He couldn’t believe I’d attracted so many subscribers with what he called my “mediocre scribbles”.
Mrs. P and Mr. I are still here as I am typing this. My other roommates2 are not really bothered by them. I am not sure they even notice them being around. But one who gets along with them really well is my Inner Critic. He sits beside me while Mr. I keeps holding his monologues, nodding in agreement. My Inner Critic is also a fan of Mrs. P’s suggestions on what I should do or not do, because he doubts my projects will turn out well anyway.
I like to believe they all mean well. That maybe they are here to encourage me to give my best, to push forward, but also to reflect on what I am doing and sharing with the world.
Interestingly, when I was working on the collaboration with Manuela, they were amazingly quiet. They watched, but let me work. Sometimes, they even left the room entirely, letting me create undisturbed.
I hope they will take the hint and realize now that it’s time to move on.
I say farewell with a few photos I made on my weekend getaway over Easter.
That’s all from me this week.
Thank you so much for being here and for taking the time to read this week’s newsletter. It means a lot to me.
X,
Susanne
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I would say uninvited guests, but I know at least one of them is reading my newsletter.
My husband and my dog.
Well, you must know that we are all there with you with those guests in our Guesthouse (thanks Rumi). I recently came across this: When someone asked William Stafford how he managed to write a poem every day, he said, “ I just lower my standards!”
I think this couple gets around! I’ve hosted them several times myself. - What I often find is that their visit comes before a period of great creativity.